Identity Library

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Hey everyone, welcome to a new episode of Identity Library. My name is Veronika Becher, and I'm joined with my best friend, Loridana Foksha. Hello. Thank you so much for coming again. Thank you for having me second episode. Yes, we are recording this episode way too often than we should honestly. This reminds me of like, you know when you write an essay and you just can't finally finish this conclusion, and it takes you like five times to finish having fun. Okay, it's okay. It's okay. We're just staying cool, I guess. Um, well, I would love to talk about Spain. Spain. Why Spain? Let's just give us a rundown. Why Spain? Yeah, where we're coming from, like with Spain, but that's just the topic, right? Yeah, love Spain. So I'm as well as Veronika. We're both in a program called the International Business dual degree program, ibdd, for short, which is also run under, like a cohort of Business schools, IPBS. So what this is, is you spend two years in your home country, and you spend your last two years in like a different country, where you're learning the language of and like Veronika, she's she did her first two years in Germany. Now she's here in the US. I'm doing my first two years here NC State, and then my last two years I'm

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gonna be going to Madrid, Spain.

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Okay, that's enough. I'm joking. Yes. And, well, why this episode? Yeah, after thinking for such a long time, and I was like, so many students are moving now. And, well, it's almost a whole year that I moved here two days in, I just feel like a lot of people could benefit from having someone talk about, yeah, anxiety, feelings, thoughts about moving abroad, deciding to even live so far away for two years and well,

I just would love to you know, would love you to share your thoughts on this topic. So, yeah,

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a little bit context today is August 6 and

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August 14. So next week, I'm flying out to Spain, and I this is also going to be the first time I've traveled outside of the country. I've only the farthest I've been is up to New York, down Florida, and then like Alabama, and that's the farthest I've been in all directions. And to live in for two years, like my first time going out to the country is going to be staying for two years is a little terrifying, but more exciting. This is something that I've always wanted to do growing up. I was always thinking about, you know, what did I want to do in high school, I did engineering, which was a complete flip flop from Business Administration, um. Hmm, even nowadays I miss them, but people are texting me right now

getting distracted Podcast. I'm so sorry. Shame on you. Shame on you. So many people like to talk so famous, it's okay, yeah, leaving so love, of course, they want to get to know you better on the last day in days before one day

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I know I'm joking. Back to the top, yeah. Anyways, yeah. Actually, how this all came up when I was younger, I was I watched a lot of YouTube when I was of the most random things. A lot of it was culture things. I would watch a lot of things from like, different parts around the world, cultures, traditions, what they would do, and constantly, just like, interested in people. I was always asking questions. Even coming from a non American, I'm from, like, a Slavic Balkan, like, a different culture than everybody else.

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I always was more open minded to experience I always wanted to experience different things, especially since, like, I was so closed up and, like, a part of town that, like, you know, I barely ever went away from and I remember, when I was younger, I watched this one YouTube channel called yes theory. And the first video I've ever watched from them, I was 12 years old, and they threw a dart on a map right and on the map of the US, and wherever the dart landed, they were gonna fly there and spend like a couple days in and I thought that concept was so cool, because I love the idea of doing things in the moment, just like in the spur of the moment. And I watched more of their videos and how they went to random countries, even like the smallest, like the least touristy countries, and had, like, such an amazing experience. They go there without any direction whatsoever, and they find accommodation, and they find

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help from random people that talk to they to talk to me, being the introvert, I thought this was so cool because it was something that I've never was able to like do. And I thought it would be, it was so cool that they would just go up to random people and like, Hey, we're here and we have no idea what to do. Would you like to be our tour guide for the day? And it would be locals. It wouldn't be like, actual couture guides, or like, they would be with locals, and, like, not even in, like, the most busiest parts of the city and or, like in the country, and they would just, you know, explore and do things on their own. And as soon as I saw that, that's what I wanted to do, I remember texting my friend. I was like, I want to travel the world. And I want to do long term traveling, where, in digital nomading, where, basically you take your job remote and work in travel, Work and Travel basically, yeah, and I wanted to minivan, not like minivan, maybe America, but like, two weeks, two months, stay in one place, and then whenever I want to leave, pack up, go somewhere else and just have, like, the most minimal amount of things that I need and really work so I can, like, support myself, but like, also maybe, like, do odd jobs here and there, if I needed to, if I needed to, like, stay with some people, I can be like, I can babysit for you or something like that, or tend to your garden whatnot. This

reminds me so much of I had in high school an acquaintance, and she went to Australia, so she was like working for a wildlife Conservatory, and she was traveling the whole whole Australia in like a whole year or something, and she was just living there, like a nomad. Really interesting experience. And that's what I want to do. Yeah, a lot of people, for some reason, in Germany, when they graduate high school, they go for this one year abroad where they study somewhere, or they travel somewhere, work in different companies, or, I don't know, just different things,

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which I also think is interesting how studying abroad and traveling is much more it's much more normal in Europe than it is America, because America, in of itself, is Such a big country that, like, you travel like, whenever you go on vacation, you're still in America,

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yeah, but the reason is also in Europe. For instance, if you study abroad, you get a scholarship called Erasmus, and it's for people that live in Europe. And you can just apply to get an Erasmus scholarship, and they will pay. For your housing, for your tuition, for, like, a lot of things in additional, like, you just get a lot of money for just traveling abroad. And I know a lot of people since Germany has the biggest ipbs network of, like, international dual degree corporations, because it started there, right? Yeah, it's one of those starting funding places. We have 12 different countries in comparison to NC State having four right from Spain, France,

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Spain, Italy and Germany, Germany or China, used to be on there, but I don't think it is anymore. And

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that's the thing. We have 12 different we're from China to Brazil to like Spain, Italy, kind of all kind of countries. So when people say, in Europe, they just get almost everything paid by Erasmus, if they can apply, and then, depending on how much money do parents make, you get more funding or less. Yeah. Well, America is different, yeah. And it's also different for you guys, right? Traveling, I feel like we're just doing a lot of marketing content for

IBDD, to IBDD guys. It's great. Oh my gosh, no. Seriously, all the incoming students are coming in tomorrow. Oh, and aren't you doing the orientation for them? Oh my gosh.

That's crazy. Anyone ever sees me on campus and thinks like, Who is this random girl. And I don't know when this

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huge entire, like a huge group is following her

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as well, crazy, just leading an entire I remember, like that one time we were with the interns from Hitachi, more marketing for Hitachi, and you were, like, talking about, like, Oh, I remember, like, you look like such a tour guide right now, like talking or like a perfect like talking about, we, to give a little bit of rundown what happened. We went. It's a little bit drifting off topic, but we went to factory in South Boston. It's not a secret to see the transformers. It was really funny. We were such a big group of interns and graduate students. And I feel like through working in project management, I had the opportunity to, like, get to know more about transformers. And thank you to my team. That was like, fantastic helping me, like, learn so many random things

that in the end of the day, I knew more about transformers than most people did, and even the tour guide couldn't give us the rundown. And I was like, Oh, this is, like, this transformer. This is that transformer. And so people would just follow me, yeah, not even my factory. But it was really funny. Um, I remember when we came back, we were like, kind of outside Hitachi, just like, talking to each other, and you were talking about hunt or something, yeah. And like, you were like, This is haunt and hunt is all the way over there. And you were talking about it, like, with your hand, as if you were, like, presenting to the tour guide. Yeah, I was a tour guide. And like, why are you good at this? I don't know. I just discovered this in Germany when someone asked me to do like a mini tour for NC State students. And that's how I met, like, a lot of NC State students, and get to know and I was like, Oh, I really want to go to NC State to study and be in the stool degree program. And, well, I realized that my jokes, my dry jokes, work really well when it's a tour guide. And I did take a tour guide, everyone gets them for IBDD, yeah, yes. So if anyone mentions Germans have no humor, that's not true, or just different, just different or, or, it's just my Slavic side. I'm not sure we're still figuring that out. Yeah, the same as my accent, but that's okay, yeah, um, well, going kind of back to like, Spain in um. So, yeah, international students are incoming this week, and they all come from different places. I'm like, the key key person, giving everyone the keys out, and also doing the international orientation day next week. So I'm gonna lead like 25 students from different countries, undergraduate students, and so that was also a thing. What inspired me to do this episode of you, because I feel like a lot of students come here, and I remember when we moved here, it was such a nerve wracking thing. Yeah, I was crying for the first two weeks. And I'm saying that as a person that to look forward to, oh my gosh, who went to South Dakota when she was 15 and nothing happened there? I feel like Bisons were distracting me, but I'm joking. I didn't really see them all the time, so all the time, yeah, I wasn't even living in the area to see Bisons all the time. I saw more cornfields than ever. But besides that, drifting up,

I feel like I just want to share kind of both our thoughts, me being, like, a year already in and yeah, like starting your journey, there's

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a big difference, yes, because you're already here, and I'm planning to go there right now,

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um, how is it? How do you feel about speaking Spanish, starting with one topic,

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I'm okay. I'm not that good in Spanish. Um, I use, I used to be definitely, um, like taking Spanish class. I feel like this. Entire summer has put me back, like, sent me back a little, like a lot, actually, I when I get there, but before actual school starts, we are all taking this in Spanish intensive course, I think from like, 10 to two. I don't know, I might be wrong on the times, but it's like a really long time. We're just gonna be speaking in Spanish. And I'm like hoping, because the thing is, with my Spanish, my entire curriculum, like all my classes, my exams, are going to be in Spanish and not in English, and that is stressing me out a little bit. But immersion is the best way to learn the language. And I'm kind of hoping that, like within a month, I was told from other people that went to Europe, because I feel like in Europe, you kind of know, you learn English, like a lot younger, and everyone is expected to know English, like it's becoming like a worldwide almost language and but Spanish isn't really so I was told by people who have done this before me, that your first month is you're not gonna understand anything, and that's okay. And I was like, that makes me feel better and also nervous at the same time, because I know that my next month, my like the entire next month, from August 14 to September 14, not exactly, probably, but it's gonna be stressful. I'm gonna be so stressed,

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just like, the 15th is gonna be the special day.

Finally, it's Veronica's birthday, and I know Spanish now exactly.

And then it random spider drops in your head, and you think twice about, you know, yeah, choices, no. I just, like, kind of a foreshadow. The thing of foreshadowing is just funny at this point. It's just like a thing. It's gonna be a running joke. Well, to foreshadow what's gonna happen, a lot of people cried. A lot of people were excited. I remember my German peers, they were so like, they're going crazy. They were running through the store and like, Veronica, look at this. Look at these cookies. Oh my gosh. This is something we saw, like, in, like, High School Musical, in movies, oh, they have these, like, yellow busses and, well, do you feel, yeah. How do you like, how do you feel? Did you watch, like, any movies? Like, how do you know about Spanish culture? Like, Oh,

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I know a lot more of, like, Latin like Central and South America, more than Spain itself, mainly because I was more exposed to that. I know more people from there. I'm not as exposed to Spanish culture, but I feel very unprepared. Honestly, I feel like I should know more about Spain, since I'm going there and of itself. But, I mean, I have, I have a lot of friends, like even one of my family members is Mexican. I have a lot of friends who are from Central or South America, and I was a I'm very acquainted with that kind of culture. And I feel like this is going to be a very, I I know this is going to be a very big difference in culture. Um, why Spain? Like, I was learning Spanish. Oh, really. Well, did you start? I started learning Spanish. Um, kind of a little bit middle school, but mainly, like, I fully started in high school. I didn't think I was doing this. So there's, like, a requirement to, like, know, Spanish. But the thing is, the main reason why Spanish is because I found that it was so easy to learn because of my Romanian background. I found that learning Spanish like I saw a lot of parallels within with Romanian, and even taught me more about Romanian that I didn't know. And I was like, oh, when my mom's walking me through conjugation, like, I understand what she's doing now, because I used to not be able to understand, like, why do we put certain words like this? And in my head, when I was younger, when I spoke Romanian, it just kind of fluid like that. And now I feel like I'm more aware of what I'm saying when I'm speaking to my family, which is a big deal. Yeah, sorry, sorry, but I think Spanish, because it made me more connected with Romanian, and I could have gone and done Italian, because I feel like Italian is a lot more closely related to Romania. That is Spanish. But I think I wanted to fully be set in Spanish first. I wanted to be fluent in it first before I went to another language, to a different culture, in a sense,

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yeah, like you just answered my other question. Me answering like, asking it, you know, yeah, um, what are your like expectations like, what is something like? Your top three things I love, the top three things, I guess things.

Yeah, good conversation rolling.

What is something that you like? What like would you look forward to in Spain, besides your. Mean, yeah,

I love that room. So many windows I won that room. Oh my gosh. I just, I need to give a rundown. I know this is your story, but, yeah, just go. Go for it. Tell my story. Both are working right now at the same company for the summer, but in different departments. Yeah, and Loredana was for like, I don't think, I think a month. Don't tell my managers this. No, I'm not telling you. No. It's the fact that you were debating on, like, so long, so long, what room to not even so like, a week, maybe, yeah, but it was kind of like Veronika. What do you think Veronica? What is the best choice? Yeah, what is what room feels more like? Lodana? Yeah, room feels more like Spain, and Laura is like a fantastic artist, by the way, just giving like a clap to her for winning a capstone project last year for the,

oh my God, for the what is the village? Arts village? Yeah, yes. Oh my gosh. This is a different story that probably a different day. You know, it just took us. We were just not ready. When everyone was ready. We were just setting it up for hours. Yeah, but yeah, it was a performative piece. Yes, oh my gosh. Performative piece, my dear friends, please remember to improvise in life. Sometimes it works. It works. It

gets it gets you first place. Yes.

So what are your top three expectations? I am so excited and ready to make more friends. I think that, mainly because I'm comparing it to my experience at NC State. I didn't expect to this is the part where I start crying. I didn't expect to have such a close knit loving community, and the fact I'm leaving him like it makes me sad. We have a running we have a running inside joke, I cry a lot. Very emotional person. This is like, I don't have tissues right now, besides a random like, paper towel

But yeah, froggies here the green froggy. If you haven't listened to the first episode, you will know what's happening. Preview,

yeah. So basically, we are sitting at juvla, and people that live here, they know is that the first time I cried? Oh my gosh, I don't even know the amount of times you cried during this whole year. It's just crazy, and it's okay. I love, you know, having friends that are really expressive, because I cried a lot too, but it's not characteristically my thing to cry that much. It's my thing. Well, yeah, just I cry. I cry. Just imagine when people like, make these movies about this guy who does something bad in a cafe, like, or someone like a restaurant, and then everyone turns around, oh my gosh, he's a bad guy. Well, I was a bad guy, yeah, but for this reason, because we were just sitting there having our deep conversations, like we always do, cup of coffee and tea, because I'm a tea drinker, and Laura's just getting super emotional about it, starts crying, and everyone just turns around, like, I'm sorry. It's not by far. How many

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times have I cried there? Like, I think three times four, probably, but yeah,

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I don't know how much it tells about us more than it tells about the place, but it's okay,

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yeah. Anyway, yeah, um, yeah, but I'm expecting to do the same in there. Um, I'm excited to have a cohort of friends of really close of a really close community, something that I really value when I want, like, I explained that I want to travel, and one thing I really want to do is connect with other people and be able to girl, don't look at me like them. Want to start crying, to stop

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like crying, just getting super I think just my heart community

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and connecting with people is something that I really enjoy, and it's like also something that I found in you and my friends here, and I'm excited to spend time with people that are different than me, that think people that I can learn something from. And I've learned so much here from my experiences and the friends that I've had here. Um, shout out to Veronica, obviously, Max and Juan and like, they've also been there for me, and even going there Kate, she's someone that, like, is, you know, getting ready with me, to go with me, because we're going together. And, yeah, I I'm excited that I know that you guys are irreplaceable, and I understand that like I will never truly find people like you, but I'm excited to find people who are different that I can have. I'm not expecting to have the same experiences or be able to find friends like you, but I'm excited to have different friends, to know different people. And to experience different things that will help me grow and evolve and become and I want to become a better person through people, because I feel like that's one of the biggest ways you can be able to grow and develop as a person. I

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remember reading up this article, and it was like, the reason why people feel like they're different in a different country, is the moment you and I can really quote it, but the moment you subtract everything that surrounds you, your heritage, your background, your friend groups, your family members, everything that is just defining you in the space you're living in right now, and you kind of like just set yourself apart in a different place you can start from, like a blank page, yeah, and because you're starting from a blank page, you start realizing what is something you really like, and I just in what you want to become, and so on. And just remember this one thing you told me to this point, I literally wrote down in my journal that sometimes if you travel to different places, I don't know if you remember, it was like a random late night talk and your car, like, always, you know this thing, when you say, right before I drop Yeah, you're like, five minutes and get out and then end up, like, an hour, yeah, an hour conversation, and you didn't want to come into my apartment, and we still talk for an hour in your car, like, I

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need to go home. But I really did tell you something, yes,

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um, and she literally, like you literally told me, Well, sometimes it's maybe if different people bring out different sides of me, yes, and sometimes it's not that I'm different, it's just maybe I'm so diverse and I have so many different like layers, that that's the reason why, why I can be a different person in different person in different countries, in different places, because I have so many more layers to me than just being a business student, just being an artist, just being someone who likes to read books. And it just reminds me so much of like I think that's just a great advice to remember that

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you're you don't have to be one specific person, and you don't have to put yourself in one box. I think you can not only know who you are from, like, a very deep level of, like, your entire identity, but know that you are constantly adding layers to yourself. I think them. Onion,

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onion, I was thinking about that onion. People say, like, oh, ogres. People

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say, um, ogres have layers and oh my gosh. I think of a shout out to my mom. She makes a joke all the time. I love her.

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I think of onions like, when you need to peel each layer in order to understand how a person is, yeah, and yeah. I think also maybe when you travel to different country, be aware of how many different cultural differences you have and how deep it goes. Yeah, like, I just remember my first weeks here, and it was just a mess. It's something you don't want to remember, but it's just the fact that how direct I am as a person, and people know that, and they need to get used to it and how different cultures can be, and I imagine Spain is going to be also a complete different experience for you, but

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it's something I'm excited for. I think one thing that I truly value myself, one a part of my identity, or something that like a very a strength of mine, I'd say I'm an adaptable person. I different situations, different situations. I can bring out different parts of my personality, or I can depth my personality in some way. I wouldn't say I'm too like, completely two faced. I'm still myself. I still know I'm not completely putting up an entire wall, but I think of my personality is very malleable, and million

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almost, yeah, exactly you pretend to be someone else. You still are true to yourself. And that's like the question of identity, right? Yeah, that we're discussing on this podcast. Of like, how do you find your identity if you have so many layers to yourself, and you kind of are thrown between different cultures, and you just not sure which one to adapt and which one to stay true to yourself, and how to also not force your own beliefs onto someone else who grew up in a complete different field, right? Yeah,

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I think a big thing, and also something that I would tell your your you your past self when you came here,

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oh my gosh.

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I think it was important for you to fully accept yourself and also be kinder to yourself. And that's that's a big deal, and I think know that you are struggling, and you're going you going through a hard time, but as my sister says to her kids, you can do hard things. That's something I learned from my nephews, that you can do hard things. And I guess just giving yourself that that room and that space and being able to know like I'm in a completely different environment, I shouldn't expect myself to pick up everything that I should be picking up. I should give myself room and time and space to grow and learn and then start from there. Yeah,

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do. You have, like, something like on your bucket list, if we expand the expectation part and say, What are like, two other things you really want to do? Yeah, Spain travel.

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I remember Juan came back right from Europe, and we're having a conversation about his travels, and he's like, letting me know, like giving me advice. One thing he says, I know it like, I know it'd be easy for you to, like, you know, go to a mall and buy everything that you want, and especially since it is, like, cheaper, but really save your money to travel. And, like, use your money to travel, I think for my entire experience there. Like, I want to my top two countries, Italy and Greece. Like I want to go to Italy and Greece. And the weekend before school starts, we're going to go to Valencia, which is, like, the beaches of Spain. Something that I'm really, really excited to do is travel, which is something that, like, I always wanted to do, but like, it's crazy how this idea of mine is finally coming to fruition.

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We're in Greece. Any idea? No, oh, okay, otherwise, you

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have to let me know. Man, yeah,

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because I've traveled to Greece quite a lot. But also, like, if you talk about traveling, I feel like my experience started when I was five months old. And I don't remember everything, because my parents just traveled my whole childhood. They, like, saved up the money only for traveling, yeah, and I feel like I got a lot of experience, but the moment I stepped on an airplane by myself, I was like, this is nerve wracking. And the older you get, the harder it gets to leave, in the harder it gets to leave your family and your friends, and especially when you're in college for two years, you establish your network the people that you care for that are close to you. I have a shout out to Ari, who is like, to this point, my best friend, and she's like, texting, call me monthly, weekly, even though we're like, apart, not like, six hours or something apart, and it's very difficult to, like, leave this behind and start a new chapter. If you had a good chapter beforehand, yeah,

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I think one thing they'll be carrying with me, good friendship will last, is a big thing. I don't I will. I don't think that the friendships, the true, close friendships that I've had here, I don't think that's ever gonna go away, no matter how much I travel. And one thing that I learned from my friends, that I really think is cool, is how we all love to travel. Two of our best friends went to Europe this past summer, and boy, I thought about them every day. I was like, I miss them so much. And as soon as they came back, I saw them both separately, right? And I sobbed as soon as I saw them, because I miss them so

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much. No person like always, yeah, one

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thing I love about myself, I love that. I love that being,

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you know, being expressive for sometimes really like a gift, like, I just feel like sometimes when something happens to me, I feel like I don't feel anything, yeah, for the first month, and that's just me being like, Oh, I'm like, This is strange. Like I don't feel anything. I just feel like I'm a ghost, like, no, just existing, and I'm not sure when this feeling will go away. And maybe, like, a big advice, kind of like, steering the conversation back to, like, international study abroad situations, let you so, like, don't be too harsh on yourself and give yourself time. Like, if the first month is going to be rough, it's going to be emotional, a lot of things will happen. You will feel for the first time, the distance, yeah, that you have between your home country and the country.

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And I've never experienced an entire ocean away from my family, yes, and just

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a feeling of you can never go back, but you can get go back. And I always say, give yourself a month to adjust. That's the first step. The second step is, if you're so far away, you can always go back, but you can never go back to country that you decide to travel to, yeah, or, well, you can, but it's more difficult sometimes than going back home to your family, right? And if, in third, if these are your real friends, they will stick with you no matter what. In worst case, I'm just feeling really grateful for these people that were in my life, in a chapter that I needed them. We had this conversation where I'm like, you came into my life for the first year at state, and you were such a guidance, a kind person, someone who helped me out so much during my first weeks and months at State. And I feel like finding someone who can be this person is sometimes tough, and it doesn't come planned, and she's already sobbing,

oh my gosh,

yeah, but it's just like, it's just, it's just, well, disclaimer, this is an emotional episode, and well. And I think it's just, it's just important to understand that I

told you I was gonna cry, um,

well, and that's how you feel about it. But also, I've put so much pressure on myself, on finding the right person right away, and it was so difficult. But then the person that I needed was, which is sitting in a random jazz class that I signed up one day before classes started.

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I looked lonely. Oh my god, apparently sorry,

35:28
but I love she has. I loved her hair. I saw her hair. It was

35:33
red back then, yeah, and I had, like, little pigtails. Yeah, I've never done the pigtails ever again, cute.

35:38
Oh my gosh, but I just remember her hair just changed so much through the year. We grew so much. It was like finals week. You know when you contemplate about your life decisions and if you actually should study business or not? Nothing. That

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was me after finals. I was like, should I go to Spain for business? I don't think I actually like business. I had an entire mental breakdown about business, and I missed crisis, literally, life crisis. It was so stressful. Yeah, and

36:06
I think that's a normal thing that you know it will happen. And I remember this one friend I have, Leah, who is from France. I don't know if she ever listens to this episode, but she was sitting and I Leah, yeah, I was sitting in Madrid on a bench. Yes, I also study abroad at the same university, but for like a summer before coming to the states, and we met up, and she went through this whole thing already. She graduated from a dual degree program, and she was like, you know, when we were back then, in finishing our two years, we decided to almost protest. We were like telling the coordinators, we're not gonna go abroad, we're gonna stay in this country. We don't want to go and separate. Our friends group needs to stay together. And she told me, this is how everyone feels, like everyone feels, to a certain extent, weird about going abroad in you're excited, you're nervous, you're scared. The moment you're actually on the airplane, you get, like, mixed feelings. You understand that something is happening, but you can't really process it. And all that matters is to make the first step, and I think that's the first thing you have to do. And then the moment you step over the like and get to the other country, and you start adjusting, you will have a reverse shock when you go back to Germany and you don't you can't recognize yourself anymore. You can recognize the people that you were there. You can't understand how it is to even live not anymore in the United States, not live in Spain anymore and so on, that's going to be harder than actually going somewhere. But yeah, I'm really grateful to have you like as someone who guided me. And I hope everyone who listens to that and goes through these things will find this one person that will guide them somewhere. And you know, every single time when I open a car door and I just see her, I'm just jumping around like, Oh my gosh. The amount of times we recorded these like dance videos in my apartment, and we just had these jam sessions with both our dancers. She's a great hip hop dancer, oh my gosh,

38:17
oh my gosh.

38:20
And the amount of times that I realized that these things are something I will miss, but I'm grateful for when they were there, when these people were in my life, that they supported me, that they gave me strength, and they gave me a feeling of I'm part of, I'm part of a family. I'm part of, like I actually found we had again this conversation. It's like finding a second family without actually being your family. It's people that you choose in your life, that you choose because they are like connecting with you on certain wavelength. And even if it takes you a whole semester, and I'm holding a whole monolog, I realized even if you take your whole semester, I feel like eventually you will get to this point, right? And, yeah, your last expectation. What is your last expectation?

I'm like,

she's just crying. It's okay.

39:19
I love you. Oh, I

39:20
love you too.

39:21
Um, last expectation, I'm ready to grow a lot as a person. What were my first

39:28
two? It was also global people. The second one, traveling,

39:32
traveling. Growth. I, I was so I'm so excited to grow and learn as a person. Um, and I think putting yourself in uncomfortable situations, seeking discomfort, I think, puts you in a position where you are being forced to grow. You're being forced to adapt and to take on new situations and already. Of that, and to be able to, I guess, develop into a different person. I don't in one of my values. I don't think that you end up becoming a specific person that you're meant to be, because there's always room for growth and potential, and there's always going to be ups and downs, and I think I'm excited for those downs, because it to me that is my that is the life that I want to live. I want to live a life that is fruitful, bountiful, that has so many different things happening in it, so many different experiences that I can be like I went through this growth phase where I was really or I went through a phase where I was doing nothing at all, or was doing going through a phase where I was so low or so high, high,

40:55
where I'm excited that, like, I'll be changed, changing. I'm gonna change, obviously, but

41:04
I hope you get rid of your pajamas.

41:07
My pajamas. You like my pajamas? No,

41:11
I love them, but it's just gonna be funny. The moment I see you not in pajamas, there

41:16
was one moment where, oh yeah, and tally, where I just, like, walk in with my red Christmas pajamas and my blue little cardigan, wool cardigan that my sister gave me, or, like, I remember that day I was like, Ah, just, just sneak into the sneak into the tarlington building. Is fine and just crazy. That's an inside joke. Yeah, we

41:40
won't talk about that. Yeah, this whole friendship started, but yeah, and then

41:46
she just like, oh, the front door is open, and I'm like, up on my bed, and I come down wearing slippers. And you were like, Oh, you look so

41:54
Slavic.

Like I'm fully wearing, like, like a Christmas pajama set, these like socks and these like slippers that it looks so

bitchy. Oh my gosh, yes. And I just, I just the thing with the finals week that I didn't mention. It was just, you know, one thing you need to remember, if you go abroad, be spontaneous, because sometimes you will do things you didn't expect to put on your bucket list, like calling random your hair at like, I don't know midnight anymore. Do

you want to color your hair? Okay? And I was like, I

42:34
never did this before. Yes, it was like, one day before business law. Everyone who takes business classes knows what I'm talking about.

Luck with business law, it

was the best exam I took, actually. Oh, girl,

I don't

know, no, I'm just saying the exam they had after coloring session was the best one I ever had. Best, best exam, best grade. But yeah, well, kind of finishing up this topic of really crazy international feelings. And are you stressed about packing? Yes,

43:11
I haven't even started my floor up until two days ago yesterday, my clothes, all my clothes, all over the floor. I had to tiptoe I there was, it was a struggle to find the carpet under my clothes. Oh my god, and all over the floor. All of my stuff is out because I don't want to put it away, because I'm gonna have to take it out. I have to buy on Amazon, the um, the vacuum bags and whatnot, and so many things. So I don't and like, I guess I I'm stressed about going through the airport with so much luggage. Oh,

43:47
don't remind me of that. I was traveling of two huge luggages and one small one in a backpack, which I'm gonna do, yeah, this, yeah. It's like, the moment you start packing, you're like, oh, that's like, so easy. It's just one luggage that I need. And then you start realizing that, for some reason, toiletries just are so heavy.

44:04
Why I? Why do I need so many things? And

44:08
sometimes you feel like you don't need the but then just a pair of shoes way too much. And like questioning your life decisions, how? How can you pack your life into two luggages and disappear? Yeah, yes, that's alive, but I'm nervous. Yeah, you know, yeah, an issue to have in life, hacking.

I am so stressed about packing and having to, like, check in my bags. I so I went through an airport like when I was in seventh grade. I don't remember any of it. Just recently, I had to go to DC to pick up my visa. That was the worst, probably two days of my entire life. So this is right when Hurricane Debbie was her name, I think her name is Debbie, I don't really know, started in Charlotte and my flight from Baltimore of Maryland. To DC, just like, was delayed. And then I have

a question, yeah, twin traps, yeah, how do you name your hurricanes?

45:07
Uh, so I think they, I don't know, because I know that, um, they go through alphabetical order. I don't know what we I don't know, but, like, they go through Alpha alphabetical order. And I, think there's also a thing about, well, that's more like formal, and then I think inform like, I think they tend to name them like boy or girl names based off a specific I don't really know that's funny,

45:36
because in Germany, fun fact. You know, we haven't had a fun fact in this episode, right? You can pay Fact of the Day. You can pay someone to name a hurricane after your

daughter or your son,

or someone like a family member. And so that's why I was like, Is it a thing actually, in the United States, because we like sadness is like, that's funny, because German, finally, people can pronounce my name, no, but German names are just funny, because think of, like, old German names. I'm thinking of like, Hurricane Slavic. No, we're talking about like, um, oh, like, Alfred, if you like, you think like, Oh, that's funny. And you're like, trying to, like, prepare yourself mentally for this hurricane. You're like, oh my gosh, we're gonna die and everything is gonna be bad. And it's like, Hurricane Alfred, yes. Or like, these are not real German names, but Peter, Peter, Hurricane Peter.

46:39
How often do you get hurricanes? Do you also get have, like, a hurricane season? Like us, we,

46:44
well, we don't really have that, but it's sometimes we have really bad rain and, like, we kind of have hurricanes or, like, a tropical storm. Wait, tropical No, really, we don't have trouble. It's not we get storms in general, like, like, wind, wind and rain in. Sometimes we have, like, doing school. It's it's more rare, but we had some issues with, like, no electricity and things like that. By the way, we have today hurricane going on, yeah? And then Microsoft thing,

Microsoft, yeah. So yeah, my plane, my plane fly. It's like, it was supposed to leave at 815 and we're still there at 12, and we're like, this plane isn't going anywhere. We're not going anywhere tonight. And the thing is, the next day, I have a huge trip, not huge, but like, I have a trip with my friend. I have to, like, she's picking me about seven for my house. And I'm in Baltimore, Maryland, right now and freaking out for 12, so stranded. And then I remember, oh my gosh. Veronica is in DC right now. Oh

my gosh, so And she just calls me. I was already in bed. She calls me to want to go. This is how you remember that you have best friends, and they care for you and love you so much. Thank you. You can cry again now. This is the moment you you're allowed to cry. And she just calls me, and I'm like, in my bed, I'm done with my night routine, and then she's like, Yes, I have a nut routine for everyone wondering. I'm trying, um, she's like, we're gonna come straight out here, and I don't know what to do. And I'm like, not even living by myself. It's like, my cool host family that I really appreciate, that they found the time I love not even yours, your friends, yes, but no, they became like family. I just love them so much. They're like second family to me right now. And we are, like, in Virginia, just sitting there, and they arrive there. We knock on them. I'm

48:31
with a friend, by the way. Yes, yeah. So you Thomas is able to get us plane flights because he has, like, priority in American Airlines or something, I don't really know, and he's able to get us tickets. So our plan to Raleigh, and then from Raleigh to Charlotte, anyways.

48:53
And yeah, and well, you realize like going through a visa process, no matter what country you go through is always stressful, and if you need to fly out somewhere, you will probably encounter a lot of random things where you need to be spontaneous and figure out what to do. Because

49:08
my plan was, I flew to DC, and then my plan was, fly there and back in one day, and then just get my visa and pick

49:18
it up. Yeah, and then it didn't work out. She ended up staying. We were talking till four in the morning. No, well, catching up. We just missed each other. We missed each other so much to catch up. And then I started, and she was like, you can't stop now. And I'm like, Yeah, I kind of regretted a little bit. No, I didn't. Well, I needed to get it off my chest, but things just happened and, well, here we go. So

49:43
I wake up at 530 right? And I get to the airport, uh, Thomas and I, and then Thomas is able to find a faster home, but he couldn't get me on it. And I was like, Okay. He was like, Do you mind? I'm like, go for it, like you get yourself home. I can manage so. We're in DC, right? This is a separate airport, right? So I start from Charlotte, go to Baltimore. This is a this is Reagan. Now we're in Reagan, and I managed to fly to Raleigh with no problems. And then I have to wait. I get there at 949 50. I have to wait till 250 to get on another plane back to Charlotte. So I'm in an airport for like, hours, and I'm trying to figure out if I can get a flight faster home, like, if I get on standby, but I'm in Basic Economy, so that doesn't really work out. I'm waiting there for so long. It's 240 we're boarding the plane. They get a call. We're delayed for another two hours, and at that point, and I'm tweaking, I'm losing it, I'm hungry, I haven't slept, and I cannot stand the airport. I'm in the airport by or, like, I've been in an airport or in an airplane for 10 hours, and I'm like, I can't do this anymore.

50:57
Normal flight from Germany, like, around 10 hours on flight. But I, yeah, I

51:04
get paid them and, like, we all sort that out, and I'm hoping to get back on track. Little, this little side quest to get back on track. I'm hoping that doesn't happen when I go to Spain,

51:16
yes, and kind of rounding it up, this is we came back to a Spain topic, yeah, wonderful Spain topic with good music, good vibes. People singing, dancing outside. I can guarantee you that, and people will be wonderful. I'm pretty sure about that. Be prepared for dry heat. Um, well, thank you so much for being here on the podcast. I'm kind of rounding it up this way. I think we should stop here. Maybe, yes,

I can go on for hours.

I'm a yapper. I know why noise, right? And I just want to give a last advice for all our brave travelers, yes, because you're brave, including lodana, and I'm so proud of you guys for making this step happen and actually going on this airplane or whatever you're using, actually even like moving to different city now that school starts, I can understand how stressful it probably is for all of you guys, moving to a different country, to a different college, starting completely something new, new chapter, but remember, that's something that you think back on and be like, Oh, I really enjoyed it, or I hated it, but then you had the experience, and you know exactly what you like and what you hate. So I hope the wind is going to be nice to you guys, and you're going to be I hope so too. I hopefully say, hope

52:42
the weather is fine when I go. I hope I don't get delayed. And

52:46
if you feel like it's raining, think of Veronica's one last thought. Russians always believe that when it's raining, it's a good omen, because that means it will help you to get faster to your home.

52:59
I don't believe that, but hey, stop,

53:02
don't, don't destroy my host. It didn't happen. But, yeah, so hurricane season in and out, but rain will be good omen. Thank you so much, so

53:12
much for having me bye, bye, bye.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai